Yes, yesterday was my birthday and I find myself feeling like a spoiled child.
Not because I received an abundance of gifts or anything. More from the opposite. Because, it wasn't made a big deal out of. Because it was just another ho-hum bad day for me. The older two refused to have anything to do with the younger one ~ who feels bad as it is~ so he's crying cause they won't play with him most of the day.
Hubby offered to take me out but with the two older ones who took 2+hours to do 6 pages of schoolwork, and a baby who is coughing his head off I told him I didn't want to go anywhere with these kids behaving ( or mis-behaving ) like that. I'd just be stressed at a restaurant when J. & R. didn't settle down and behave like they should in a public restaruant. And if A. has a fever he doesn't need to go out....then again I'm still stumped as to HOW he got sick again when we were in the house all week last week except for ballet, then he was in van as I ran some errands while R. was in class.
So I found myself upset & crying because no one made an effort to do anything nice for me. No one (read dh as the kids aren't old enough to drive themselves ;) ) made the effort to pick me up a gift. And I know it isn't all about gifts but everyone else in this house will get something for their birthday WHY shouldn't I?
Hubby is going to TN for 3 days next week. Well, leaving EARLY Wed. and returning LATE Friday for work. And now I will admit it.....I am deeply jealous. I He did ask me before he told his boss he could go & I said go ahead. Seriously, he's only here 3-4 hours in the evening so what is the difference? I am the one who LOVES to travel. To get out of the house and do something, he's perfectly happy sitting here doing nothing, like we did on Sunday....we did absolutely nothing! I only get a few chances to get out during the week and Saturday was one of those chances, we were at my parents like 2 hours and he insisterd we needed to come home.
I'm going to be here, most likely stuck in the house with the kids, as we have ballet Thursday & Friday so can't really make plans to go somewhere even if the weather is going to be nice.....which I'm doubting. (Did I mention it snowed here overnight?) I'm sick of the cold!
It was just a bad day. My emotions are out of whack once again. I'm seriously thinking it's this new b.c. pill I'm on. One that I'd love to not be on, but we're done having kids and as of yet I haven't talked him into going to be 'snipped'. I'm such a fertile mrytle I don't really trust anything else.
My weight is really irking me. I've realized that I now weigh 35-40lbs. more then I did when I graduated highschool in 1994. Which is 30-35lbs. more then I did when we got married in 1995. And I know for a fact that it's 23 lbs. MORE then I weighed when I got pregnant with Avery in 2003. I had lost 13 lbs. in a few short weeks before getting pregnant. I think the lack of the pill AND teh fact that I got out and walked 6+ miles a week were the result of that. We no longer live beside that park with the walking track. No, now we live...not exactly somwhere I can walk with 3 kids. And I can't hardly get out of here when he's here either, someone has to do dinner, clean up, bathe the kids, put the kids to bed etc.
SEE? I'm just a all around grouchy kind of person. I don't want to be so moody. I don't want to be so heavy. I don't want to unpack my summer clothes to see what doesn't fit this year ~ some of what didn't fit last year but I kept telling myself would this year & I've done nothing about it since. I don't want to be so stressed over the kids being wild I want them to settle down sometimes ;0) I want some new clothes but I don't want to go up another size to get them.
Don't mind me.....I just want to sit and pout like a spoiled brat.